Marcin Jankowski, DO '05
January 9, 2019Trauma Program Medical Director, Hahnemann University Hospital, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
鈥淭his job takes a toll. You have to assume that every patient that rolls through the
front door is going to die. It is my job to make sure they don鈥檛. . . . When you
receive a patient with devastating injuries that they should die from, and you and
your team save that patient, it鈥檚 one of the greatest feelings, ever. But to tell
a family that their loved one has passed鈥攖hat鈥檚 the lowest of the low. Though the
words are coming out of your mouth as you educate the family about what happened,
it鈥檚 the human aspect of it that never gets easier. No one teaches you this in medical
school. You think about it driving home. You think about it at night. From the beginning
to the end, you think of all the things you did, and the things you didn鈥檛 do. Were
your actions all correct? You also have to realize that you are a human being鈥攖hat
the folks you work with, the folks you treat and their families鈥攖hey are all human
beings. You have to realize that every member of your trauma team is doing his or
her best, every single time. . . . As trauma surgeons, we often work 24-hour shifts,
which makes the job physically and psychologically demanding. Twenty-four hours, on
your feet, doing rounds, in the trauma bay, operating, seeing patients. These patients
are often young adults who may have had an accident while riding a bike or driving
a car. They could be severely injured and bleeding to death. Then comes the time when
you have to talk to the family, who, just a few minutes ago, had a son or daughter
who was just fine, who isn鈥檛 fine at all right now. It鈥檚 constant. And it鈥檚 emotionally
draining. . . . I need to refuel, refill my buckets鈥攖hat鈥檚 what I say all the time.
I replenish by maintaining balance in my life. . . . There was a time during my surgical
training and my early career that my job was all that I thought about and focused
on. I gained a lot of early success; however, I ignored the rest of my buckets. Now,
I spend time with the love of my life, my family, my friends. I spend quality time
with my boys, ages 8 and 11; their needs and passions tend to balance things quickly
because they make me realize what鈥檚 truly important. I also work out; I swim, I run,
I climb, I ski. I listen to music. I also have my religion. I grew up Roman Catholic;
my spiritual and my religious roots remain a profound part of my life. . . . I am
cognizant of the emotional, physical and spiritual aspects of my life. Each is a bucket;
I look within to track which is full or empty. When one nears empty, I fill it. I
replenish each one by giving it the attention, time, energy and effort it requires.
. . . It is important to decompress and disconnect from the everyday world. It is
a must. For me, it took several unfortunate events in my life to finally force me
to pause and reflect. By doing so, I came to understand the significance of keeping
all my buckets full.鈥